TOP TEN TRAVEL TRENDS FOR 2015
Here at Shandy Pockets, we have our finger on the pulse of the wrist of the hand of the finger that’s on the pulse of travel. 2015 is going to be an exciting year. Here are our cast-iron predictions for what’s literally about to happen in the nearness of future.
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iYouGoForMe.com
The sharing economy comes to travel! Are you a status-obsessed sociopath with money to burn? Time-starved, bragging-rights-needy, FOMO-baiting professionals will soon, for a fee, have the option to have poor people go on their vacations for them. The illusion of enjoyment and personal fulfillment can be maintained as the plebs pass on their photos and travel tales for the experientially-rich overclass to upload onto their choice of social media. |
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Straycations
You don’t really get to truly experience a city unless you’re wandering around it in a fugue state, not knowing where you are and foraging for food and shelter like a feral animal. High-end tour companies will be offering packages that drop you, slightly groggy and dazed and without any points of immediate reference into the middle of a confusing urban sprawl. Straycations combine the adrenaline-fuelled excitement of vagrancy with the visceral unpredictability of vagrancy. |
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Terrible Lanterns The general populace will finally recognise the fallacy of wistfully releasing a flame-powered lantern into the ether on a South Asian beach and see it for what it really is: the world’s slowest, dullest and least spiritually uplifting firework. |
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“(Insert place), I am in you” A similar universal realisation will happen with this overplayed phrase, which we all know was only really EVER funny when used to talk about Sydney. |
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Flyr.com Ultra-local micro-dating app for travellers that can’t get through a plane journey without desperately trying to hook up with random strangers like an airborne rat. Romantic searches are restricted solely to the passengers on the very plane that you are on, with premium in-app options for seat-swapping arrangements or chat mode for that coordinated bathroom rendez-vous. |
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Dubai Seriously? Still? What is WRONG with people? |
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Boutique Neutrality As predicted by hospitality scientists in 2014, the word ‘boutique’ as applied to a hotel will finally lose the ridiculous vestiges of its meaning. Any property with under 400 rooms will now fall into this category, and by 2016, it is predicted that the term will only be used sarcastically. |
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Isolation Cruising Given the near-certainty that taking any kind of cruise will result in a severe, if not near-fatal, gastric calamity for everyone on board, many cruise ships will be rolling out their isolation ward-style cabins. This will allow passengers to journey in a germ-free, hermetically-sealed environment while being able to glance out at restricted views of passing scenery – the overall enjoyability levels of cruising are, as you see, almost completely unaffected. |
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ScUber Uber, but for unregulated, untrained and completely unsupervised, slightly intimidating and untrustworthy beachside suppliers of untested SCUBA equipment. |
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Mexico Some people will travel to Mexico. |
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